Such A Beautiful Disaster
by rocketstar
Summary: Veronica Ellis doesn't really like people and at her old school she had quite the reputation as the silent troublemaker with a temper that should be avoided at all costs but Veronica has a secret, she has several secrets that burden her as she transfers over to McKinley for her junior year and much to her dismay the glee club may achieve something no one else has; saving her...
1. Chapter 1

Food. That was the first thing on Veronica's mind as she walked into her aunt and uncle's home after coming home from a long day at school. Making her way through the foyer and into the kitchen and towards the fridge Veronica was intercepted by Charlotte Ellis, commonly known to Veronica as Aunt Charlie when she was in a good mood. Veronica frowned at her aunt, the only reason why her aunt was getting in the way of her and the fridge was because she wanted something from her. Although her aunt should really know better as even Veronica knew that she was more likely to agree to something if she had food in her mouth.

"How was school today Veronica?" Charlotte asked and Veronica further frowned as her aunt was getting between her and food to ask how her day went? It was utter madness and Veronica was convinced she was having one of those days where she was convinced that everyone apart from her were complete morons.

"Hell is more like boredom, or not having enough to do, and too much time to contemplate one's deficiencies." Veronica drily replied, since her aunt was getting in the way of food than Veronica would be difficult.

"Who?"

"Dorothy Gilman." Veronica replied.

"Every day since you've started William McKinley I've asked you the same question as soon as you've gotten home and you've yet to give me a straight answer." Charlotte quipped and Veronica rolled her eyes, her aunt was trying to make a joke with her. And she would have given her aunt a straight answer today perhaps if her aunt was currently standing in her way of the fridge.

"I hadn't noticed." Veronica lied trying her best to remain somewhat polite but she was running out of the ability to feign being nice and the longer her aunt stood in the way the more Veronica was getting annoyed. Now her Aunt Charlie was a very nice lady but Veronica was tiring of entertaining the woman and was getting increasing closer to shoving her out of the way to get food.

"Someone's cranky, are you hungry?" Charlotte asked.

"Always." Veronica stated as her aunt asking her whether she was hungry was a bit of a redundant question as Veronica was always hungry. Her response caused Aunt Charlotte to laugh.

"Sit down and I'll whip you something up, how does a chicken and bacon sandwich sound?" Charlotte asked and Veronica nodded as she sat down on a stool next to the breakfast bar and watched her aunt prepare her food. She was still convinced that her aunt wanted something from her, it was just of how long it took her aunt to get round to asking whatever it was she wanted. "So Pavlo called today, a few minutes before you arrived home…"

Veronica felt her jaw hardened and she waited a few moments before she chose to finally respond. "Who?"

"Don't play stupid with me Veronica we both know who he is." Charlotte stated and Veronica eyed up her aunt, hoping her aunt would for once drop the subject but that didn't work. As Charlotte Ellis was one of those people who wouldn't let things go and it irritated Veronica to no ends but as she lived in her aunts house she had to put up with it. Just how Aunt Charlie had to put up with her mood swings.

"Fine. What did my ex friend Pavlo want?"

"He called wanting to speak to you and see how your doing, it's been weeks since you've seen him and Nora… They both really miss you Veronica–" Charlotte began.

"–Well they should have thought about that when they decided to go and get stoned the day I was burying my father now shouldn't have they? I needed them that day and they pulled a stunt like that! I said I was never going to forgive them for that!" Veronica snapped putting emphasis on the word never, she could never forgive people who went to go and get high instead of coming to her side on the hardest day of her life. To Veronica her former only two friends no longer existed.

"I know you did but Veronica it was four months ago and you didn't mean it, you were having a real hard time and your emotions were all over the place…"

"Do you not think that I recall that! I know how long it's been and I did mean it! I don't want anything to do with Pavlo and Nora anymore and I sure as hell don't want them mentioned in this house again! Let alone calling her! Is that clear?" Veronica snapped which caused her aunt to back away. It wasn't in shock or surprise but it was a natural response these days.

Over the last few months Veronica's family in particular her aunt and uncle had been at the receiving end of her temper even if they hadn't done anything wrong like now. Veronica knew it was wrong of her but it was natural for her to use her mouth to lash out when she didn't like things. Veronica was well aware of her temper and how bad it could get but the never ending looks of sympathy and people asking how she was doing never ended and was really starting to piss her off. Veronica just wanted to be left alone and so far that had yet to happen. "Aunt Charlie I-I…."

"I know your sorry and you didn't mean it, I call Pavlo back and tell him to stop calling." Charlotte replied with a small smile as she slid Veronica's sandwich over to her. "Now eat up, you're not fun cranky."

Veronica managed as much as a smile as she had been able to muster in the last four months as she took her sandwich and began to eat. But as she was eating she noticed three pairs of eyes staring at her from the corner of the kitchen but Veronica chose to ignore it until she finished eating. After swallowing the last remnants of her sandwich with a glass of milk Veronica turned her attention to her three little stalkers. "You know I read somewhere that if you stare at a beautiful woman for too long you'll turn into stone."

"Good one Veronica." Charlie snorted in amusement as she left the room, leaving three children to stare at Veronica in shock.

"Relax I'm joking munchkins." Veronica said addressing her three little cousins, her three most favourite people in the world and for the last four months the only things that had kept her going. They were her sunshine on her otherwise rainy says. There was Rupert who was ten and the eldest of her three younger cousins who looked just like her Uncle Henry with the same features and dark brown hair but had his mother's intense hazel eyes. Then there was Casey who was seven the exact clone of her mother but with her father's blue eye and Veronica found her cousin to be much nice than her mother. And lastly there was Christopher or rather Kit as he was nicknamed, named after their grandfather and was the spitting image of his father but with his mother's dirty blonde hair and the most adorable five year old ever. Veronica loved them all like no tomorrow.

"Veronica!" Kit called out as he ran over and Veronica picked him up and placed him on his lap.

"So what have you all been doing?"

"We were upstairs playing with Danny, waiting for you to come home and then we could hear yelling so we knew you were home." Rupert said with a small shrug of her shoulders which made Veronica feel even worse. Her aunt and uncle could deal with her temper and all the shouting she liked to display but her cousins were always the ones forced upstairs when she was in one of my moods. But even then they could still hear her.

"Yeah..." Veronica wearily began, not sure of how to begin to explain why she had been yelling at their mother this time.

"Piano! Piano Veronica, play!" Kit demanded and Veronica couldn't help but look at her cousin in amusement, the kid was bizarre and no doubt his mother's son but she looked the munchkin nonetheless. "Play piano!"

"He wants you to play the piano." Casey said.

"I figured that…" Veronica replied.

"Play! Now!" Kit demanded getting more excited with every second and Veronica looked at her cousin.

"Veronica, you should listen to him. The little man knows what he wants." Charlotte told Veronica from the kitchen archway. "Besides don't you usually play round about now?"

"Fine! All gang up on me!" Veronica relented scooping Kit up and throwing him over her shoulder as she made her way into the living room with Casey and Rupert quickly following. The four of them made their way over to where Veronica's piano sat at the front of the house right next to the windows and Veronica lifted Kit off her shoulders and plopped him on the floor and his siblings followed suit, and soon enough all three of them were looking at her with expectant eyes. "Okay, so what do you want me to play? Do we want some Mozart or Bach today…"

"No!" Three voiced chimed in together.

"Mama favourite!" Kit cried and Veronica sighed.

"Really? You want to hear that one again? But you hear it all the time, your mother makes me play it all the time! Don't you want something else for once?" Veronica asked as Kit was referring to his mother's favourite song, which was Moondance by Van Morrison.

"Play mama's song!" Kit demanded.

"Geez, okay I'll play it…"

Well, it's a marvelous night for a moondance  
With the stars up above in your eyes  
A fantabulous night to make romance  
'Neath the cover of October skies  
And all the leaves on the trees are falling  
To the sound of the breezes that blow  
And I'm trying to please to the calling  
Of your heart-strings that play soft and low  
And all the night's magic seems to whisper and hush  
And all the soft moonlight seems to shine in your blush

Can I just have one a' more moondance with you, my love  
Can I just make some more romance with a-you, my love

Well I wanna make love to you tonight  
I can't wait till the morning has come  
And I know now the time is just right  
And straight into my arms you will run  
And when you come my heart will be waiting  
To make sure you're never alone  
There and then all my dreams will come true, dear  
There and then I will make you my own  
And everytime I touch you, you just tremble inside  
And I know how much you want me that you can't hide

Can I just have one a' more moondance with you, my love  
Can I just make some more romance with a-you, my love

Well, it's a marvelous night for a moondance  
With the stars up above in your eyes  
A fantabulous night to make romance  
'Neath the cover of October skies  
And all the leaves on the trees are falling  
To the sound of the breezes that blow  
And I'm trying to please to the calling  
Of your heart-strings that play soft and low  
And all the night's magic seems to whisper and hush  
And all the soft moonlight seems to shine in your blush

One more moondance with you in the moonlight  
Can't I just have one more dance with you my love

When she had finished Veronica sighed, hoping that she could get some peace not that she had pleased her cousins but she was distracted from that by the sound of clapping. Whipping her head round Veronica saw that she and her cousins weren't alone in the room as there was her Uncle Henry along with her one of her new teachers. "Wow veronica that was great."

"Kids go upstairs to my bedroom, put on one of your dvds and each take a candy bar from my bottom desk draw then the shut the door. I'll come upstairs and join you once I've finished talk with your dad." Veronica calmly said not wanting to lose her temper in front of her cousins, so she'd wait until they were safely in the confines of her bedroom before she started. Not needing to be told twice about free candy Veronica's cousins got up and ran out of the room in a blink of an eye and Veronica waited until she heard her bedroom door slam. "Uncle Henry what is going on here?"

"Veronica, this is Will Schuster…" Henry began and Veronica rolled her eyes, she knew who the man with her uncle was but that wasn't what she had asked him.

"I know who he is Uncle Henry, Mr. Schue is my Spanish teacher and the question I asked was what is going on here and to expand on that, why are you both here and how do you know each other?" Veronica demanded.

"Well I live here…" Henry quipped.

"Very funny, but you don't usually get home for another hour, so spill…" Veronica bluntly retorted as she hated it when people treated her like an idiot when she was the furthest thing from it, especially when it was her family.

"Charlie was right; you are in a really cranky mood." Henry stated and Veronica just narrowed her eyes at her uncle, he was being captain obvious today.

"Veronica, your Uncle Henry and I know each other through mutual friends and he asked me if I could come over to see you and I see why, you're very talented when it comes to the piano and singing. He also tells me that you play the cello…"

"I used to–" Veronica began as she stopped playing the cello months ago, along with everything else she used to do. The only things that Veronica did these days were go to school, play the piano, do homework, eat, sleep and avoid her mother as best she could and she was perfectly content with doing that for the rest of her life or until she left for college.

"But she's taking them back up again, aren't you Veronica?" Henry said walking over to Veronica and placing his hand over her shoulder. "Something to give you stability and keep you out of trouble."

Veronica did everything she could not to glare at her uncle as she had no idea what the man was talking about, well she did about the trouble part but not the part about taking up all her old activities again. Veronica made a note to have a discussion with her uncle about this as he knew very well that she did not respond to demands or being told what to do. But for now she'd go along as not to embarrass him in front of Mr. Schue.

"Veronica, have you considered joining the glee club? Mr. Schue asked.

"No frigging way! Never going to happen!" Veronica retorted rising from her paino stool as she'd rather be dead then join the glee club. Sure she could sing but that didn't mean she wanted to do it and get involved in competitions and wear costumes. Veronica's lively hood was playing the piano and not show choir.

"Veronica…" Henry began warning her about her language.

"Hey! I could have used a different f-word there buddy but I'm working on the profanity thing so I'm allowed to use my words!" Veronica retorted.

"I think you should, you're obviously very talented and I think you'd be a great addition to the group." Mr. Schue attempted and it was clear as day by the look on her face that she wasn't buying anything he was saying in the slightest. In fact Veronica was close to walking out the door as she realized that her aunt and uncle had set her up. It was all planned and it explained everything in particular why he aunt was acting so weird when she arrived home.

"Veronica, I'll make a deal you join glee club and I'll pay you $50 a week if you go to ever rehearsal." Henry offered and Veronica was tempted for a brief second.

"I don't want your money."

"Then what do you want?"

"I want a dog." Veronica announced.

"A dog?" Henry asked skeptically.

"Yeah a dog, preferably a puppy." Veronica reaffirmed, technically she didn't want a dog it was Kit who wanted a dog specifically a chocolate puppy – his words not Veronica. Anyway Kit really wanted a dog but his parents kept refusing and so to punish her aunt and uncle for this whole set up Veronica asked for a dog. She knew that they did not go to all this effort to get Mr. Schue here and con her into performing for her to turn down the glee club offer. Veronica wasn't stupid she knew that she was being forced into it so in retaliation she was forcing her aunt and uncle to get a dog to get her cooperation. "Chocolate Labrador puppy called Fitzgerald, Fitz for short. That's what I want and he has to be here by the end of next week at the latest."

"You've got yourself a deal Veronica." Henry reluctantly said.

"See you tomorrow Mr. Schue." Veronica smugly replied getting up and heading to the kitchen as conning people made her hungry. A minutes later Veronica heard the front door close which meant that Mr. Schue had left and soon enough her uncle joined her in the kitchen.

"Kiddo, can we talk?"

"And by that do you mean talk? Or force me into joining another stupid club, but thanks for the ambush; I have to admit it was very carefully planned. Kudos to Aunt Charlie for using the kids, she knows I'm a sucker for whatever they ask." Veronica replied not lacking in sarcasm and her uncle responded with a sigh.

"Yes and I'm sorry we had to go behind your back but it was for your own good. We really think you'll benefit from the glee club."

"If you say so." Veronica drily commented.

"I was also being serious about you taking up your activities again; you're back on cello as well as doing glee." Henry stated.

"Uncle Henry can you hear yourself, how the hell I am I going to manage my cello lessons on top of my piano lessons, school, homework and glee along with school?" I demand.

"You managed it last year and if you think it about it if you're wrapped up in your activities and don't have time for anything else you might not have to see a certain person who you've taken up to avoiding again." Henry told her with a wink.

"And I thought Aunt Charlie was the devious one… You didn't tell Mr. Schue about her, right?" Veronica asked and when her uncle shook his head veronica took a deep breath before continuing. "If I do this, I do glee club well I don't exactly have a choice in it but I want you to promise me that you won't tell her. I can't deal with her trying to control another aspect of my life especially with this... "

"She's your mother Veronica." Henry stated.

"So what if she is? But we've all seen her when it comes to this stuff, she's ruthless and she doesn't care about the people she hurts all she cares about is being the best and winning. It's my business and I don't want her involved as far as I'm concerned my business is only her concern when they fall on her days as per the custody agreement. Tell her what you like but just don't tell her about glee."

Henry looked at Veronica for a long while before he finally relented. "I have no qualms about lying to your mother but here's the deal Veronica, you stay out of trouble and keep your grades up and do your activities, we won't say a word to your mother. But you do realize she'll find out about you doing glee club eventually considering who she is…"

"Let me worry about that."


	2. Chapter 2

Veronica sat in the choir room all alone on a chair that was practically as close to the wall as she could get with her Ozzy Osbourne esque glasses covering her eyes. She couldn't believe that she was actually here in glee club. It was like she was in one of her nightmares but Veronica knew she wasn't dreaming. Technically she wasn't the only one here as Mr. Schue was here but currently in his office getting things together before everyone else who was presumably not forced into joining glee club turned up. Now Veronica hadn't turned up early because she was eager, she figured the sooner she got this over with the quicker it would end and she could put pressure on her Uncle Henry about getting her dog. The more she thought about it the more Veronica was very looking forward to getting Fitz. Sitting, idly minding her own business Veronica was alerted to the presence of somebody else in the room by the sound of footsteps coming towards her. Glancing up from looking down at her boots Veronica saw a boy, a tall boy who had sandy blonde hair, with green eyes and was wearing brown rimmed glasses.

"You look like you want to kill someone." The boy noted as he too took a seat in the back but he was wise enough not to sit next to Veronica.

"The day's still young." Veronica found herself replying in a dry tone of voice before resuming her previous activity of staring at her boots but as she did, she couldn't help but feel that the boy was still watching her. After a moment Veronica realized that he still was watching her. "You're leering at me, why?"

"I'm not leering, I'm just staring as I'm wondering why your wearing sunglasses whilst your inside. Big difference." The boy quipped.

"Not in my book there isn't Mr. I like leering at people." Veronica replied.

"Hey! Not too far off my name but it's actually Raif."

"That's nice." Veronica said in a dull tone of voice pushing her sunglasses on to the top of her head so she could pinch the bridge of her nose. She really needed a coffee or a danish, perhaps even both as well as a nap not to mention an aspirin. This boy was something else.

"I knew I recognized you, Veronica? Your Veronica Ellis aren't you?" Raif slowly stated and Veronica just rolled her eyes, for some reason she had this huge reputation despite the fact that she had done nothing but kept her head down and stuck to herself. She wasn't here to make friends, all she wanted was to do her two years, graduate and get her diploma before finally leaving Lima.

"So what if I am?"

"Nothing." Raif replied with an amused tone of voice before tilting his head to the side and Veronica could have sworn that she could see a smirk in the corner of his mouth. She didn't like any of this in the slightest. It was making her feel more out of her depth than she usually did. "It's just that I was expecting you to be a little scarier that's all and not to be here in glee club of all placed…"

"Excuse me?" Veronica asked barely containing herself from spluttering like an moron in shock. Raif's reaction was a little odd to her not to mention something she hadn't encountered before specifically the whole Veronica not being as scary as he thought. Normally people avoided Veronica because they found her down right terrifying and mysterious but not Raif. It was weird and Veronica didn't like it at all.

"I don't mean to offend you but people talk about you all time, your kind of feared around here Veronica and people talk about you all the time and I've heard some pretty wild stories about you. So I was kind of expecting someone different perhaps with horns and a pitchfork." Raif explained and Veronica wasn't sure whether to be offended by what he had said or impressed that he had a mind of his own.

"I left the pitchfork at home, I'll be sure to bring it with me next time." Veronica grimily replied as she slid her sunglasses back down onto her face.

"So what's the big and apparently bad Veronica Ellis doing in glee club? Last place I'd expect someone who got kicked out of their old school for dumping a vat of dye into the school pool as well as supposedly releasing close to a hundred stick insects into the ventilation system and the principals office…" Raif and asked Veronica just ignored him given that he was diving in territory that she didn't want to get into not to mention he was making her feel rather uncomfortable. "Okay if you won't answer any of those then answer this, are you really as scary as people make you out to be?"

Veronica didn't answer at first. "You ask a lot of questions."

"And you avoid them." Raif retorted.

"Why do you care?" Veronica questioned sliding off her sunglasses and looking at Raif properly for the first time. "We've only just met, yet you seem very interested in a person you don't know."

"Maybe I want to, did you ever think of that? We're in glee club and a part of this team that Mr. Schue is trying to put together. So it's going to be kind of hard not to get each other Veronica as we all have to work together. It would be nice if we could all be friends." Raif began as a few more people started to make their way into the room and Veronica rolled her eyes, she could tell that Raif was just like her aunt i.e. one of those people who just wouldn't leave well enough alone.

"I don't have friends."

"C'mon everyone has friends Veronica." Raif prompted.

"Not anymore." Veronica sarcastically quipped, going into her bag to pull out a bottle of water and a pill bottle. Opening the cap, Veronica took one pill and popped it into her mouth then swallowing it down a mouthful of water before returning the two bottles into her bag. It was days like these that made Veronica grateful that she was being medicated for once. "Trust me I'm not a person you want to know. I'm not likeable and I sure as hell don't like people. I'm not here to make friends. So stop trying."

"And why don't I believe that?"

"Believe what you like, that's what everyone else does." Veronica retorted as she had long stopped caring about people thought about her years ago and Raif looked like he was about to say something but stopped when Mr. Schue walked into the room. Which Veronica was somewhat grateful from the reprisal of being psychoanalyzed by a boy she had just met.

"Hey everyone, I'd like to welcome you to the first glee rehearsal of the year…"

Veronica definitely needed a danish.


	3. Chapter 3

Veronica sat awkwardly cross-legged on the floor of the auditorium stage as they too a break from rehearsals. In the last couple of days they had gone from sounding like an utter train wreck to sounding less like a train wreck. This miraculous development was due to the school quarter back Finn Hudson joining the team so now their numbers stood at a measly eight. There was two freshman Artie, a seemingly nice yet geeky boy in a wheelchair and Tina a goth who had a stammer, Veronica couldn't see herself having a problem with them however she couldn't say that about the others. The sophomores Mercedes and Rachel seemed like diva's in training and about to graduate to full on diva's and Veronica suspected there was going to be trouble. Especially since Rachel was already pissing Veronica off, however the other sophomore Kurt wasn't too bad given that he amused Veronica somewhat. Then there was Raif, a junior like veronica and a full on a pain in her ass.

"Great job so far guys but before we carry on I just wanted to run an idea by you all, on Saturday Vocal Adrenaline, the Carmel high school glee club are putting on a showcase and I thought we could all go. It would give us a chance to check out the competition as apparently they are the team to beat at regional's…" Mr. Schue announced to the group. "So you guys interested?"

"Sure!" Several voiced chimed together,

"I for one think that's a very good idea Mr. Schue as observing Vocal Adrenaline will, like you said allow us to see what the competition is and then we can build on that! And by that I mean the rest of you to see the beauty of performing and see what you have to do in order to support a star like me." Rachel added and Veronica just rolled her eyes as the girl was overly confident in herself for some so young, had quite the ego too…

"What about you Veronica? You just transferred over from Carmel, how about it? Field trip to back to your old school to check out the new competition, could be fun…" Mr. Schue suggested.

"Do I look like the kind of person who gets involved with glee clubs?" Veronica asked before realizing how redundant that question was but in her defense she had been forced into this. Which reminded her to hurry up her Uncle Henry up with her damn dog. "Forget it, don't answer that… Anyway count me out of your little field trip which doesn't sound fun in the slightest because I can't go back to that place."

"Because of the suspension?" Kurt asked, his face lighting up with excitement at the prospect of gossip and scandal and Veronica chose not to answer. She wasn't here to be a source of gossip and fascination to these people, they could talk about her all they liked but Veronica wasn't going to engage any of it, instead just get on with what she came here to do.

"No, it's obviously because of the restraining order that bars Veronica from being within 200ft of Carmel." Raif corrected with an amused smirk on his face that Veronica didn't like in the slightest. There was something about him that Veronica wasn't sure of, that she didn't like. Most likely his self assurance and the fact that he didn't seem to be scared of her like everyone else was. The big thing that annoyed Veronica was that Raif seemed to like challenging her and pushing her buttons to get a reaction out of her.

"Suspension? Restraining order? What are you guys talking about?" Rachel asked looking around in confusion as if she was missing some big picture that was right in front of her. Veronica would laugh if it was something that she was still capable of doing.

"Veronica was kicked out of Carmel at the end of last year that's why she transferred to McKinley at the start of this year, didn't you know?" Artie asked and judging by the fact that Rachel's eyebrows almost disappeared into her hairline Veronica guessed that the little drama queen wasn't aware of that tidbit of information.

"Is this true?" Rachel demanded.

"Basically. I'm not welcome there and I don't plan on ever going anywhere back near that place." Veronica replied with a small shrug of her shoulders and Rachel looked like she was going to lay an egg over this entire thing. Or her head was going to blow up. Whatever it was, Veronica was sure that it was going to be hilarious.

"Mr. Schue! How could you allow a delinquent to the join the club! This is going to ruin everything!" Rachel hissed turning on her heels to face Mr. Schue enraged at what she had discovered.

"Delinquent? Berry, within an hour of meeting you I could tell that you were a spoilt brat with control issues who thinks their superior to everyone else and I can deal with that. That just means you're like any other stupid teenager but just with one hell of a superiority complex. But what makes you think that you have more right to be here than me?" Veronica asked as she rose to her feet and walked towards Rachel, she was going to knock the little glee princess down a couple of pegs for a few hours.

"Veronica walk away, you're the older one here so set an example…" Mr. Schue began taking a step towards her.

"People can be bad and still be in glee club, it doesn't have to consist of saints and goody two shoes like you Berry and for your information you can't call me a delinquent as I'll have you know that I've never been juvenile detention nor have I been arrested. Haven't even gotten a single parking or speeding ticket…" Veronica announced with a small snicker, she may be many things and done a lot of things but she was no criminal. Looking around once more Veronica backed up a few steps before turning around and picking up her beg from the wings of the stage and walking down the stairs.

"Where are you going Veronica? We're not done yet!" Mr. Schue called out.

"Well I am, I have some business to attend to." Veronica vaguely replied as she walked up the aisle and made her way out of the auditorium and towards the car park. Twenty minutes later Veronica was sitting in a booth at the back of a diner idly sipping a glass of water through a straw with a two slices of apple pie sitting in front of her when the person she had been waiting for had finally shown up after Veronica had been waiting for just over five minutes. Veronica didn't say anything at first just waited until her mother slid into the booth. "Hello Shelby."

"Hi Veronica, how are you?"

"What do you want? Your message made it sound that it was vital that we meet today instead of you waiting two days until I come over to your apartment as per the custody agreement." Veronica asked ignoring the question about how she was doing, it was the one thing she hated being asked especially when it came from the bane of her existence; her mother Shelby Corcoran. Veronica didn't get on with her mother, hadn't for years which is why she could her mother by her first name of Shelby instead of mom. Their relationship was difficult and strained most of the time that Veronica couldn't actually bear to be around her so instead she lived with her uncle four days a week and stayed with her mother on the weekends. So her getting a message from her mother stating the two of them needed to meet urgently was something that made Veronica naturally suspicious.

"It is. Your Uncle Henry and I both received a call from the county prosecutors office this morning asking if we'd come in as the county prosecutor wanted to talk to us." Shelby replied before taking a deep breath and Veronica knew this wasn't good. "He wanted to inform us about the case against Mark Walcott."

Veronica picked up the fork beside her and used it to start eating the pie, she needed something in her mouth as her mother spoke to her about the man responsible for making her life the way it was now; the drunk who had killed her father by mowing him down with his car when he was twice over the legal limit. "What about it?"

"Firstly they've finally been given a trial date of November 24th and the county prosecutor is going add additional charges of operating a vehicle impaired, reckless driving amongst others to the charge of aggravated vehicular homicide that they first charged him with after your dad died–"

"–Was killed." Veronica bluntly corrected, her father didn't die in his sleep or die in some peaceful manner. Her father was killed by a man who had three previous charges of operating a vehicle impaired because he liked drinking and driving. But none of them had resulted in serious charges, not until Mark Walcott had finally killed someone; her dad."

"What do you think Veronica?"

"It's about time, it's been four months already. It's a shame that the state doesn't give the lethal injections to bastards like Mark Walcott but the sooner he's in jail the better." Veronica spat before pausing to take a sip of her water and once she had finished she ran her hands through her hair.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Shelby questioned.

"No."

"Okay we can talk about something else, Henry told me that you've taken up your activities again which is really good Veronica. Tell me about school, how's it going? Have you settled in and made friends?" Shelby asked by Veronica wasn't listening, she had drifted very far away from the conversation. She wasn't even lost in her own thought, Veronica wasn't just in her own oblivion. "Veronica!"

"Huh?"

"Sweetheart you zoned out completely… Are you okay?" Shelby asked.

"Of course I'm not okay!" Veronica snapped at her mother before closing her eyes and rubbing her temples, this day had been psychically and mentally draining on her and Veronica just wanted to give up. That wasn't a realistic option so instead Veronica continued eating her pie and tried to avoid her mother's piercing gaze on her.

"Are you taking your medication?" Shelby questioned and Veronica sighed, it had only taken her mother less than twenty minutes to ask whether she was on her medication. "Veronica please tell me your still taking your medication?"

Veronica waved off her mother's ill wanted concern. "Yes I am still taking it."

"You must be running low Veronica, have you started halfing your meds so you can conserve them? How many pills do you have left?" Shelby asked and Veronica knew she was in trouble and despite what answer she gave, her mother would still check her bag so for once she'd be honest with her mother instead of her regular habit of lying to her mother's face.

"Two and a half, maybe three." Veronica admitted. "How'd you know?"

Shelby sighed as she opened up her bag and handed Veronica a bottle filled full of pills no doubt a refill of her Prozac prescription. "Dr. Floyd called and told me that you'd be needing a refill, he also informed me that you haven't gone to any of your sessions in the last week. Veronica you can't be doing this, your getting help because you need it."

"I am perfectly aware that I'm on antidepressants because I'm depressed Shelby, you don't need to point it out to me. I understand that I was too far down in a dark abyss of crap to be saved with happy thoughts and hope. We've all been aware of it for the past three months now. " Veronica hissed in annoyance, she hated it when people tried to explain her condition to her as if she wasn't fully aware that she was depressed.

"Then why haven't you been going to your sessions with Dr. Floyd, you can't treat your depression with just drugs Veronica. You know that part of your treatment consists of therapy, not just the drugs."

"Maybe I don't want to see Dr. Floyd anymore, did you ever think about that Shelby?" Veronica stated when people said Dr. Floyd to her it sounded like Dr. Freud who would have had a field day with her is she were his patient. "I'm not crazy Shelby, so why should I see a shrink?"

"I know your not crazy Veronica, you have an illness but why don't you want to see Dr. Floyd anymore? You agreed to see him when you first started treatment and now you've decided to stop."

Veronica narrowed her eyes at her mother. "Why do you care?"

"You're my daughter."

"So?"

"Veronica…"

"Fine. You want to know why I don't want to see Dr. Floyd anymore because I don't think it's achieving anything. I have therapy which is just this cognitive crap and then I have counseling. I'm sick of talking about it about all constantly, how dad was killed by some jack ass who seemed to think it was okay to drive whilst drunk. I'm sick of talking about how I feel about seeing my dad died. I went through something traumatic and I lost someone I loved and I couldn't cope. There were days I would cry from the moment I woke up till I fell asleep, I couldn't get out of bed for days and I didn't' think I could go on and I still have days like that. Then I did something I'm not proud of… I know I'm a mess and yes I needed help because I was barely functioning. I'm still barely functioning and that's with the help with Prozac. I don't want to talk about that anymore or about my issues with you and why I live with Uncle Henry. It won't change anything, dad will still be dead and I'll stick be sick or whatever you want to call it…" Veronica stated, she was fully aware of her problems and all the dark days she had had in the last few months, which is why she agreed to get help in the first place.

"Look I know you don't like talking to people at the best of times even more so since your father passed away but you know that all of this, the prozac and the therapy is to make you better Veronica…" Shelby said and Veronica couldn't help but scoff. Her family hadn't even realized something was really wrong with her until about a month after Veronica's dad Daniel had died.

"I want to be left alone Shelby…"


	4. Chapter 4

Veronica pulled into the garage and turned off the engine before climbing out the car and she was promptly followed by her Uncle Henry. It was a nice Saturday afternoon and the two of them were hanging out whilst her aunt had taken her cousins out for the day. This was their thing. Going for walks and just talking, at some point during the week Veronica and her Uncle Henry would go out for a hour to run errands and have a meaningful conversation that wouldn't be interrupted by the dysfunction that went on in their home. Today they were out running errands and one of them included getting the oil of Veronica's car changed. Now Veronica was fully capable of doing it, the thing was that her car was a classic and it required special attention. To put it quite simply Veronica preferred having a professional taking car of her car who knew what they were doing then her messing around with the car.

"Hey, can I help you?" A familiar voice asked and Veronica looked up to see the last person she wanted to see. Raif.

"Oh god, not you… Is leering not enough for you? You now have to stalk me?" Veronica demanded as she lifted up her sunglasses to see Raif standing infront of her dressed in overalls with a smug grin on his face.

"Nice to see you too Veronica and no I'm not doing either, I'm working." Raif quipped as he motioned to the overalls that he was wearing.

"Do you two know each other?" Henry asked.

"Somewhat." Veronica admitted.

"Raif O'Connell I'm a friend of Veronica's, we're in glee club together."

"Friends, really? I find that very surprising as Veronica tends not to have any friends as she hates people and considers friends to be persona non grata." Henry stated and Veronica couldn't help but smirk, persona non grata was one of her favourite words ever.

"Well I say friends, Veronica would probably say something different…"

"Regardless It's a pleasure to meet you Raif, I'm Henry Ellis, Veronica's uncle." Henry said and Veronica decided to intervene before the two of them got a bit to friendly with each other. If she didn't act quickly then Raif would have Uncle Henry telling him the Ellis family's entire family history.

"I can see the resemblance." Raif noted.

"What are you doing here? Aren't you supposed to be with the others at the Vocal Adrenaline showcase?" Veronica asked moving things alone as she was very much aware of the resemblance between her and her uncle. They both had the same dark hair and blue eyes although Henry looked like his parents and Veronica had a mix of her grandparents and a bit of her mother thrown in. However the person Veronica really looked like was her father.

"And I was supposed to, unlike you my restraining order doesn't bar me from going to Carmel but my boss called me this morning and said he had an old friend coming in today and I had to come in to help out with some of the others car whilst he worked on the incoming car. I'm assuming that the old friend that Larry was referring to is your uncle's car." Raif said and Henry quietly snickered at the mention of Veronica's restraining order.

"Correction it's my car." Veronica spat.

"Your car? You own a Porsche 356A Cabriolet, impressive." Raif stated as he glanced over at the silver car that Veronica was standing next to and for some reason Veronica felt extremely defensive. Technically she didn't own the car as she was given it as the car had belonged to her father, her Grandpa Ellis had brought it not long after her father had been born and worked with him on it. Her grandfather had given it to Veronica's father when he passed the bar and Uncle Henry was given his great grandmother's engagement ring. Veronica was supposed to be given the car upon her graduation but her grandfather decided to give it to her after her father had died. It was one of her most prized possessions.

"Thanks for the seal of approval grease monkey, anyway I'm here to get the oil changed so take these and give them to Larry and we'll be back in an hour and you had better not be anywhere near my car when I get back." Veronica stated chucking the keys and walking away but after a moment she realized that her uncle wasn't behind her. Turning around Veronica saw him briefly talking to Raif before catching up with her. "Um… What was that about?"

"Oh nothing, I just invited Raif over for dinner tonight."

"Why would you do something like that?" Veronica hissed.

"You need a friend Veronica, you don't have any ever since you vetoed Nora and Pavlo from your life. I know you hate people Veronica but you need someone in your life outside the family." Henry reasoned.

"I hate you." Veronica grumbled but she didn't mean it and she knew her uncle was right.

"No you don't kiddo." Henry quipped and Veronica just rolled her eyes as the two of them walked. The two of them walked for about five minutes in silence before Henry cleared his throat. "So we've noticed you've been quiet the last few days…"

"Being quiet has become my new thing." Veronica drily noted.

"I've noticed and it suits you but you've been very quiet and withdrawn these last few days, I'm assuming that it's to do with what your mom told you about the case against the man who killed Dan. If it's about the actual case then don't worry, the case is strong and your father will get justice." Henry said, his words getting stuck in her throat during the last part of his sentence and Veronica glanced over at her uncle. Sometimes she was so caught up in her problems that she forgot that she wasn't the only person who had lost someone. On May 6th 2009, the night that Veronica's father Daniel Ellis died it didn't just changer her life but also the life of her uncle's. In a single night Henry Ellis lost his older brother and best friend but he also took in his niece; his brother's only child and had been raising Veronica as if she was his own despite knowing full well that Veronica could have lived with her mother. Henry brought Veronica home, gave her the guest bedroom to make her own. He made sure that she had somewhere to sleep, food, clothes and so much more. Henry Ellis was Veronica's hero and the greatest man that she had ever known.

"Shelby said the same thing to me, for some reasons she thinks that the case finally going to trial is going to push me over the edge and I'm like 'Shelby I'm depressed, not suicidal' but at least she's stopped giving me grief about everything else…" Veronica quietly said.

"She's worried about you, everyone is…"

"Except you for some reason." Veronica stated, challenging her uncle to state otherwise.

"Veronica you suffered a huge loss and it almost killed you, then you went off the rails for a bit and fell into a very dark place and I don't blame you for that. You did things that I'm not exactly proud of but you came to me when you realized something was wrong and that you needed help. The last few months you've gone through more than you should have Veronica and now you are trying to find your way back after a massive lost. I don't need to worry about you because I know that you know your own strengths and weakness, and you'll come to me when you need help. Your strength amazes me, your trying your hardest to come back from what happened and I couldn't be prouder…" Henry said and Veronica was surprised about how much faith her uncle had in her given that she really pushed his buttons a couple of months ago.

"Why do I get the feeling your going to tell me to go back to Dr. Floyd?" Veronica skeptically asked.

"Because I am, I know you hate people Veronica and you don't like talking about what happened and your feelings especially your problems with your mother but Dr. Floyd is trying to help. Look Kiddo, I know you take your pills everyday but that isn't enough, you have to go and talk to someone other than me. Besides, you only have about a month or two left of sessions and then you're done with it and just on the antidepressants." Henry reasoned.

"I'll think about it." Veronica began. "Can I ask you something?"

"Always."

"Why did you decide to take me in? After what happened you could have just sent me to Shelby's?" Veronica asked as her going to live with her and uncle and aunt hadn't been a simple thing. It involved a contentment of her father's will as her father had named Henry as Veronica's legal guardian, however her father only had sole physical custody and shared legal custody with Shelby. With her father's death Veronica technically should have gone to live with her mother given her parental rights given how she was Veronica's only remaining living parent. But because of Veronica's adamant refusal to do so and both Henry and Charlie willing to fight for custody an agreement was struck up. Physical and legal custody was to be split between them and Veronica would live with Henry and Charlie on the weekdays and stay with her mother on the weekends and they'd split the holidays.

"I knew you'd eventually ask me this, it took me by surprise when I found out that Dan had named me as your legal guardian, never in a million years did I ever think events would turn out like this. But I never made the decision to bring you home with us, there was never anything to think about. You are my brother's only child and you needed us Veronica."

"You argued with mom so much about it, even when I was out of control… But you took it in your stride whereas dad would have grounded me until after I finished college." Veronica wearily laughed referring to her brief period of drinking, swearing, tantrums and other things she wasn't proud of.

"Dan's death almost destroyed all of us but watching you self destruct almost killed this family. I had just lost my brother, I was not going to lose you kiddo. You were hurting and we understood that and we just wanted to help. And look at you now Veronica, look how far you've come and I'll tell you something now kiddo, the rest of us are so proud of you too; your dad would be too…"

"I miss him all the time and the pills don't change that, they don't make it any less easier for me to get out of bed and carrying on with my life despite dad not being here. It still hurts."

"I know it does kiddo as I miss him everyday too and I know that there's nothing I can say to you that will make it any easier but know that you are not alone. We are right here next to you and we will always be here for you. I will always be here…" Henry told Veronica as she was the only person she could talk to her dad about without losing her temper. It was because he understood her pain, Veronica may have lost her dad and Henry may have lost his brother but Daniel Ellis had also been their best friend. The person who had been there for the two of them every single day of their lives.

"Sometimes I'll be driving home from school and I'll end up at our old apartment and I have to remind myself that I don't live there anymore. That's not my home…" Veronica admitted for the first time, she hadn't told anyone about that and there were plenty of other things she was keeping to herself which didn't include the fact that she was on antidepressants, she had joined glee club and her biggest rivals were coached by her mother and then there were those rumors about her. Veronica had a lot of secrets.

"You went through a huge lost, your trying to find you way back from that and it's going to take time…"


	5. Chapter 5

To say Veronica was pissed off that her uncle had invited Raif over to dinner was a bit of an understatement. He was well aware that she disliked people and yet he had gone and invited someone over in the vain hopes that Raif would become Veronica's friend despite her stating several times that she did not need or want friends. Being alone suited her, being alone meant that she didn't need to depend on people or be disappointed by them. Veronica was one of those firm believers in that saying 'born alone, remain alone and die alone' it was pretty much her own personal mantra. She liked keeping people at arms different as it made her feel secure and in control. People were tricky and capable of hurting each other which is why Veronica didn't like people as a whole and trust them as such. Which is why she didn't want new people in her life, more to the point she didn't want people being forced especially over dinner in her own home.

"I can't believe that you're actually going along with this Aunt Charlie." Veronica said as stood in the archway of the dining room and watched as her aunt went about finishing setting the table for dinner.

"And why wouldn't I be? I think that it's a good idea that this boy Raif is coming to dinner given that you need someone to talk to and before you saying Veronica your family and psychiatrist do not count."

"So if talking to Dr. Floyd doesn't count then that means I don't have to go and talk him to him on Monday." Veronica couldn't help but point out.

"You know what I mean, look whilst I understand you don't want Nora and Pavlo in your life anymore because your having a hard time with everything and you need positive influences in your life, you need a friend. As much as you hate people in general you need someone to hang out with, talk to and do general teenaged stuff with." Charlotte said.

"But I don't want to have friends I am perfectly content being on my own and even if I did want a friend, I wouldn't ask for my family's help. Aunt Charlie I sixteen years old, I turn seventeen in less than a month! I so do not need a play date as they are for little children which I've already pointed out I'm not one. Not to mention I don't like Raif in the slightest…" Veronica replied.

"Why not? Henry said he was perfectly nice boy with a job I might add and he's also in glee club."

"Well he's rude, arrogant, has an answer to everything and he seems to think he knows everything–"

"Just like you, which means you'll get on perfectly." Charlotte retorted and Veronica just glared at her aunt before walking off to the living room to go watch some tv. Specifically the news, other than documentaries the news was one of the only things Veronica watched on tv as she liked to be reminded that people's lives sucked as much as hers did, sometimes even more.

"Is that what your going to wear for dinner?" Charlotte questioned as she followed her niece into the living room.

Veronica looked at the black Sabbath t-shirt and denim shorts she was wearing, she saw nothing wrong with it and she wasn't going to change for somebody like Raif especially in her own home. "Yes, but if you cancel this dinner I'll change into whatever you want me to wear."

"Not happening." Charlotte retorted.

"You know I could just leave."

"Do that and I'll ground you for a month and you know I will do it." Charlie threatened and knowing that she had lost this one Veronica went about ignoring her aunt by watching the news as she had nothing further to say to her aunt. Veronica just watched the report about how the government was screwing them over once again when her youngest cousin Kit came and sat down on the couch next to her.

"Tell me munchkin, how can you be so cute and sweet yet come from such evil parents?"

"Huh?" Kit asked and Veronica couldn't' help but laugh as she ruffled her cousins hair, how she loved her younger cousins as they made her unbearable life worth living and made living in this zoo enjoyable. Despite the fact that her aunt and uncle were literally out of their god damn minds. Her only worry was that they'd end up like her which was very worrying and concerning because it was bad enough having one Veronica Ellis in the world, the last thing Veronica was another three.

"Don't worry about it kiddo, it's big kid stuff nothing that your little head needs to be worrying about anytime soon." Veronica assures her cousin and the two of them went about resuming watching the news although Kit wasn't paying the upmost attention given he was five. Days like these Veronica wished that she was five again but everything was less complicated, her dad was alive and she still lived with both her parents and she wasn't on the happy pills. Not to mention people listened to her opinion. But she couldn't be five again, she was sixteen and living in a messed up world. When the doorbell inevitably went signaling Raif's arrival Veronica stayed in her seat not moving from the couch.

"You not going to get that?" Henry asked Veronica as he made his way through the foyer towards the front door, pausing briefly on his way to address Veronica.

"Why should I when I have you to do it for me?" Veronica replied in a dry tone of voice and her uncle rolled his eyes before making his way over to the door. Veronica knew what was happening next and she wanted no part of it and so she continued watching television until she noticed that she had even more company i.e. her entire family and one extra person.

"Raif I'd like you to introduce to Veronica's aunt and my wife Charlotte and our three children Rupert, Casey and Kit who is sitting with Veronica." Henry stated before turning to his niece. "Veronica would you like to say anything?"

"I would but you know that I don't like vulgarity in front of the kids, last thing we want is them using my dirty words. Plus I'm saving my best insults and one liners until dinner for better dramatic and awkward effect but thank you for asking." Veronica quipped.

"We would apologize and say that Veronica doesn't usually behave like this but that would a bit of a lie but please don't think the rest of behave like her." Charlotte said.

"Oh don't worry about it, Veronica's bluntness and the fact she says whatever is on my mind whenever is one of the thing I like most about her. It's very refreshing to come across." Raif replied and Veronica just blanched as she watched him suck up to her family before walking around the living room. "You have a very beautiful home Mrs. Ellis and is that a baby grand piano?"

"Don't touch it." Veronica said and she watched as Raif turned around to look at her with a small frown, no doubt challenging her about it. "Before you ask the piano belongs to me and I'm very particular about people touching it, that piano is my livelihood in a nutshell and no one touches it unless I say so."

"I figured given the control issues you've demonstrated since the day we've met especially over your car but I am surprised that you play the piano. It's not something I would have associated with you considering your known for other things than playing the piano." Raif retorted and Veronica could afford to laugh. "So how long have you been playing?"

"Almost twelve years."

"Impressive."

"Perhaps." Veronica drily replied.

"Veronica is very gifted musically, academically she does great too but she really excels musically and creative. Veronica is a very talented cellist as well but her true gift if the piano Raif although you won't hear it from her, whilst you wouldn't guess it by looking at her Veronica is very modest." Henry explained.

"She's even teaching the kids." Charlotte added.

"And whilst apparently I'm modest my uncle and aunt has no shame in bragging about my apparent talents in order to get back on my good side which I'll tell them now isn't working in the slightest. But keep trying. Someday it may work." Veronica retorted as she stood up from the couch, picked Kit up and headed out the living room.

"Veronica you had better not be leaving this house." Charlotte warned and wearily laughing Veronica turned on her heels with her cousin being balanced on her hip from where she was carrying him.

"Kit what do we always do before dinner?" Veronica asked her five year old nephew.

"Wash hands!"

"Exactly so that's what we're going to go do upstairs." Veronica replied before walking away, into the foyer and then up the stairs and to her bedroom. Once they arrived Veronica lightly tossed her cousin on to her bed before letting out a loud sigh, her day was sucking major ass and was just getting worse with Raif McNosypants being around constantly. Although Veronica wasn't in too much danger of him finding out to many person things as she had made it explicitly clear to her aunt and uncle that neither of her parents be brought up, the fact that her dad was dead, she was depressed and was on prozac along with anything relating to her time at Carmel. Some people may be open books but Veronica wasn't one of them, she had secrets to keep.

"Hands! Hands Veronica!" Kit said.

"Alright I get it, lets go wash our hands." Veronica chuckled in an amusement as she allowed her cousin to take her hand and drag her into her own bathroom so they could be good kids and wash their hands. When they had finished washing their hands they came out of the bathroom and Veronica was dismayed to find Raif in her bedroom. "Dear lord you are actually stalking me…"

"Funny Ellis but no, your aunt had your cousin Casey bring me up here as she knew you were using the whole hand washing thing to hide up in your room." Raif explained and Veronica murmured darkly under her breath. "So this is you?"

"Yeah it is? What you were expecting black walls and crucifixes?" Veronica asked in regard to her blue and silver bedroom, clearly not what Raif was expecting.

"Pretty much."

"So glad to disappoint you." Veronica retorted as she watched Raif walk around her room taking everything in.

"Huh… You have a keyboard up here despite the fact that you have a baby grand piano downstairs?" Raif questioned.

"I can't be downstairs playing the piano at all hours of the day as I live with three children who kind of need their sleep so I have the keyboard up here so I can play with headphones in. It's called being sensible…" Veronica replied as she saw Kit put something in her bedside draw and she began to panic that he was going to pull out her medication. Until she remember that she had locked it in her top desk draw.

"Cactuses?"

"And what about them?"

"Nothing, you just have a quite a few of them. " Raif commented as he picked up one of the ten small cactuses that Veronica had sitting on the window still on one of the two windows she had in her bedroom.

"I get given them by my grandfather, he's a botanist and he likes sending me them so I know that he's thinking of me. He calls me his Little Cactus hence why he sends me cactuses…" Veronica said referring to her grandfather Dr. Christopher Ellis who Kit was named after as she took the cactus from Raif and placed it back with the other ones. She was very particular about her cactuses and had them arranged in a certain order that would make her grandfather proud.

"Little Cactus! Grandpa!" Kit laughed and Veronica nodded.

"Yes bud, that's what Grandpa calls me…" Veronica began and moments later she got an idea and so she pulled out her phone from her pocket and pressed 4 on her speed dial. "Hey buddy, why don't you take my cell phone? It's calling him right now and when he picks up you can tell him that your daddy is being mean to his Little Cactus. Then you can give the phone to your daddy…"

"Okay Veronica!" Kit replied taking the phone and running out the room.

"Why does he call you Little Cactus?" Raif asked.

Veronica rolled her eyes. "Why'd you think? It's because of my dazzling personality."

"Question."

"Go right ahead." Veronica replied as she sat down in her desk chair.

"Why do you make yourself out to be some cast iron bitch?" Raif asked and Veronica was surprised about how forward he was being with her, especially because no one talked to her like that.

"Because maybe I am one, did you ever think of that?" Veronica stated.

"I see you with your family, you may be antagonistic to your aunt and uncle but it's all playful from what I can tell as you care about them along with your cousins. You love and adore those kids, I've seen pictures of you laughing and smiling with them and looking like a proper family Veronica…"

Veronica couldn't help but laugh. "So I love my family? I don't really see why you felt like you needed to point as I'm fully aware of that despite the fact that they drive me crazy. But that's what families do and I'm no picnic to deal with myself."

"My point is that you act one way with your family but another way with everyone else. Most people at school are terrified of you and go out of their way to avoid you because their afraid you'll kill them if they so much as look at you." Raif pointed out.

"And maybe that's correct…"

"I don't believe that."

"Believe what you like, just know that I won't ever care."


	6. Chapter 6

Monday came quicker than Veronica would have liked and whilst school was barely bearable in itself, she was more concerned with Glee club. On the upside today was the deadline for her getting her dog, so if Uncle Henry didn't deliver an adorable chocolate lab called Fitzgerald than Veronica could quit glee. Veronica knew that the likelihood of her uncle not living up to his end of the end was never going to happen as he was firmly on his stance that keeping her busy was going to keep her out of trouble. Veronica understood where he was coming from glee was just something else entirely and it was like every single person in that club should be locked up in some of psychiatric facility because they were all crazy, and this was coming from Veronica who was receiving psychotic help at the moment. Waking into the choir room Veronica made a point of avoiding any eye contact with Raif as she made her way to her favourite seat in the back as she was still annoyed about him coming over for dinner. Thankfully her family played along with the whole getting kicked out of Carmel thing as Raif knowing the truth about that entire thing would just led to questions that Veronica didn't want to answer. Veronica had warned Raif after dinner that she would kick his ass if he had told anyone about the whole dinner thing. Raif had laughed as he made his way out of her front door much to Veronica's dismay.

"I know there isn't anything on my face so what's with all the freaking staring?" Veronica asked finally having enough with having the entire club looking at her as if she had grown a second head.

"Aren't you going to ask?" Artie asked and Veronica honestly had no idea what he was talking about. It had been a very long week not to mention tiring weekend and Artie could be referring something that Veronica had forgotten or was simply not on her list on things to care about. Veronica couldn't even recall most of today which would be worrying to a normal person but this was a frequent thing in Veronica's life. Veronica liked to blame it on her pills and her psychiatrist like to blame it or rather state that it was because Veronica didn't want to engage with the world.

"Am I going to ask about what? You're going to have to expand on that a bit as I'm not sure what your really going on about and truthfully I'm not sure if I want to know." Veronica replied as she took out a bottle of water from inside her school bag,

"The Vocal Adrenaline showcase? Most of us went to it on the weekend except you and Raif…" Mercedes clarified and now it all came back to Veronica as that was the day Raif came over to dinner and she didn't have to go to her mother's for the weekend as Shelby had been busy finalizing the showcase so Veronica got a pass not to see her mother. Downside to that was, Veronica was now spending the entire week at her mother's starting today.

"Oh…"

"Is that all your going to say? Oh? Veronica they are our competition and the least you could do is take a bit of interest." Rachel demanded in an annoyed tone of voice and Veronica just sighed as sometimes she didn't have the energy to be dealing with the diva in training. The girl had more energy than Kit who was five years old and had boundless amount of energy. Veronica honestly felt sorry for Rachel's parents as they must be exhausted.

"Well to be fair Rachel, Veronica did go to Carmel for two years so she must know how good they are." Raif stated and Veronica actually snorted in amusement.

"Good one O'Connell..." Veronica chuckled.

"–Wait? You've never seen Vocal Adrenaline perform?" Finn slowly asked and Veronica could see where this was going so she waited a moment before she finally answered.

"Of course not, I always had better things to do with my time…" Veronica idly replied and all of it was true, she had never seen vocal adrenaline perform in showcases or school assemblies as she had always ditched them. Not to mention the whole thing with her mom and Veronica had made an effort to keep Vocal Adrenaline and the fact that her mother was their coach away from her life. No one knew at Carmel that Shelby Corcoran was her mother except for five faculty members and unfortunately Vocal Adrenaline but no one was going to say anything about it. And Veronica liked it that way. Her and Shelby were two different people who lived two vastly different lives but just so happened to be mother and daughter. Nobody needed to know that.

"Like getting suspended?" Raif suggested and Veronica couldn't help but chuckle as much as that blonde hair nerd with the glasses and cocky attitude annoyed her, he was useful at times and occasionally funny.

"Exactly. But I hear that they are very good." Veronica added hoping to be somewhat helpful.

"You went to Carmel for two years and you didn't see them once?" Kurt asked and it was clear that he along with everyone else was surprised by this. But then again they were kind of in the dark about a few things. If they knew the truth things would be a bit clearer and make a bit more sense.

"Nope, so how were they?" Veronica asked despite knowing that they would have most likely been amazing, no doubt down to her mother who worked her glee club to an inch within their lives. Veronica would have felt guilty for them having her mother work them for hours on end and having them rehearse constantly. But she didn't as the glee club was kind of her mother's pride of joy, second to her of course. Although Veronica used to feel like she came second to it and given her tense relationship with Shelby, she was more than happy to have Vocal Adrenaline to spend more time with her mother than she actually did.

"A-Amazing." Tina stammered.

"Calling Vocal Adrenaline amazing is putting it mildly, it was something else completely and they made us look like a bunch of misfits singing down the back of some dingy alley wearing last years fashion!"

"We are a bunch of misfits though." Veronica couldn't help but point out although she decided not to say they were a bunch of misfit losers as she didn't want upset anyone as the last thing she wanted to deal with was one of they crying.

"Why didn't you tell us that Vocal Adrenaline were that good?!" Rachel demanded and Veronica took a sip of her water and blew her bangs out of her face before she finally replied.

"You never asked."

"E-Excuse me?" Rachel uttered.

"I said you never asked and even if you did I wouldn't have told you." Veronica honestly addicted as she wanted to keep her time at Carmel a very firm distance away from her current time here at McKinley. She was doing that whole fresh start thing here and that involved not having Vocal Adrenaline being a somewhat very involved part of her life and her family. Rachel and the rest of the club, Mr. Schue included could try and press Veronica for what she knew but she would never say anything as firstly she didn't know much as her mother knew how much hated glee that they never spoke about. Then Veronica saw no need for her to pass along Vocal Adrenaline tips to this glee club as Vocal Adrenaline all need their heads testing in her opinion. They made New Directions look somewhat sane.

"Why not?" Finn asked.

"Firstly it's not my place to tell you and secondly I'm pretty sure we're trying to be New Directions and not Vocal Adrenaline. And I'm pretty sure to beat them we're all going to have to be ourselves…" Veronica said surprising herself with how optimistic she sounded. Naturally she blamed it on the prozac. "Look you guys need to stop freaking yourselves out as it's not going to help anyone here. Sure Vocal Adrenaline may be great according to what you saw but we've got something they haven't got."

"And what's that?" Mercedes questioned and Veronica couldn't help but sheepishly looked around.

"I don't really know, I haven't quite figured it out yet but I'll get back to you when I have."


	7. Chapter 7

Veronica awkwardly sat in a cushy armchair in the confines of a fancy not to mention expensive and professional looking office, surrounded by bookshelves that held fancy and expensive looking medical textbooks. There were several diplomas on the walls that showcased the academic achievements of Dr. Graham Floyd, Veronica's annoyingly well meaning psychiatrist who wanted to fix Veronica and wasn't content with just writing her prescriptions for Prozac. He actually wanted to Veronica to talk about how she was feeling and use various types of therapies to help her much to Veronica's dismay. Dr. Floyd's ideas of how treat Veronica wasn't exactly agreed with by Veronica, which is why she had been skipping several of her sessions until her mother found out. So Veronica was back at her sessions with Dr. Floyd. Talking about her life in hopes that would fix her. Given the amount that her family was paying Dr. Floyd, it was going to take a while. And Veronica had already been doing these therapy thing for almost two months now.

"You didn't answer my question Veronica." Dr. Floyd stated.

"Yes I did."

"Veronica you told me all about glee club, all the members and if I recall correctly you called a Rachel Berry, an annoying 5ft 2 spoilt brat with a stick shoved so far up her ass that you could practically see it coming out of her head. Then there was something about your coach Mr. Schue quitting momentarily to them come back… I didn't ask for you to tell me about glee club. I asked how you felt about being in glee club, there's a difference." Dr. Floyd corrected and Veronica frowned.

"Why does it matter what I feel about it? Either way I have to go to glee as it's part of my uncle's warped plan to keep me on the straight and narrow. Uncle Henry's real big on me staying out of trouble as is Aunt Charlotte and my mother seem to share the same sentiment." Veronica idly replied.

"It matters Veronica. Everything you feel matters, no matter how bad or good the feeling is which is why I want you to talk about it. I specifically asked you about glee club to try and evoke something from you. Because I know that your mother is the coach for the glee club for your former school. I'm asking how you feel about this because you've hinted at having a slight resentment towards your mother because of how much time she puts into glee club. Yet you've now gone and joined the rival glee club…"

"Stop with the Freudian analysis already, this has nothing to do with my mother or my subconscious desire to hurt her and punish her for not being around. Trust me I like not having Shelby around, it makes my life easier and she knows it hence why she is trying not to stifle me lately. My issues with Shelby have no part to play in this, Uncle Henry was the one who set this glee thing up." Veronica replied.

"Yet you agreed to it." Dr. Floyd couldn't help but point out.

"It'll look good on college application."

"Still aiming for Julliard?" Dr. Floyd asked and Veronica's jaw couldn't help but hardened as she had no idea how he knew that as she had never told Dr. Floyd about that. Well not that she could remember, she could have told him when she had first started treatment when she was deep in that dark hole of grief she was in. But Veronica highly doubted it as she didn't divulge anything more than she had to. "Your mother told me, she said that you had been dreaming of attending Julliard since you were twelve years old and your godfather took you there when you went to visit him in New York."

'I don't remember, but if Shelby says it's true then it probably is." Veronica said as she blew her fringe out of her eyes.

"Do you still want to go to Julliard?" Dr. Floyd asked.

"I don't know." Veronica honestly admitted.

"Do you know why?"

"My dad. It was his dream to see me at Julliard, it was him that encouraged me to play the piano and pushed me to keep playing when he realized how good I was. Then he died and things changed. Everything changed after he died and things that used to make sense don't anymore. You asking me whether or not I want to still go to Julliard is something I can't answer because I honestly don't know anymore. I haven't known anything for the last four months." Veronica replied in a rather uncomfortably manner.

"Since your dad died? Your Uncle called me and mentioned the trial was going to start in a couple of weeks, he thought that it was important that I know." Dr. Floyd said and Veronica looked away. She didn't like talking about her dad at the best of times, with her mom or any other member and she especially didn't like talking about him with people like Dr. Floyd who hadn't known her dad. Talking about him hurt, it forced Veronica to remember the entire day of how he died. How her dad had left the apartment that morning with a smile on his face and promising to check her world history report when she got home from having dinner with her mother. Veronica remembered coming home to an empty apartment with Shelby with her dad nowhere in sight. Then the phone call came. The call from Henry to Shelby telling them that Dan, Veronica's dad had been a victim of a serious hit and run. And that it wasn't good.

"I don't want to talk about him anymore." Veronica said her voice crackling ever so slightly. The most important reason why she didn't like talking about her dad was because it meant remembering seeing her dad in the hospital. All bloody and bruised and hanging on for life. Holding his hand and talking to him for one last time before he finally succumbed to his injuries. Veronica hated having the image of seeing her father die before her very own eyes in her head. It was something that she would never be able to erase and people bringing her dad up didn't make it any easier for her.

"Okay. But we will have to talk about your father and what happened to him at some point." Dr. Floyd stated and Veronica just bit her lip and she forced herself to look at an ugly abstract painting that was hanging on the wall closest to her. "Tell me about your birthday."

"It's soon."

Dr. Floyd laughed. "I know."

"So what? You want to talk about how it'll be the first major event in my life without my dad? I know that already without the reminder. It's going to be hard and I'm telling you that because I'm well aware that it will be. I _think_ that it will be hard, just like every other day of my life since my dad died. I'll smile and be nice to all my family who have come down to Lima especially for my birthday. When people ask I'll tell them I'm fine despite everyone knowing that I'm not fine as people who are fine aren't on anti depressants when they are sixteen. I'd say that I'd try not to cry as I blow out the candles on the homemade birthday cake that my Grandma Rose made for me as I think to myself that my dad should be here. But I stopped crying two months ago ever since I realized that something was wrong with me and I wasn't fine." Veronica snapped as she had enough with Dr, Floyd for now. He was all for talking and Veronica hated talking, there was only so much time that she could spend with this man before she finally lost his temper.

"Veronica…"

"You can't cry when you're as empty on the inside as you are on the outside Dr. Floyd, I'd think you'd know that given that you are the shrink." Veronika retorted. "How's that for telling you how I feel?"

Fifty five minutes later Veronica strolled into her mother's apartment and threw her school bag onto the couch. Veronica could hear her mother banging around in the kitchen so she headed in that direction as hopefully Shelby was in the middle of cooking something. Ever since Veronica had started doing the whole shrink Shelby had made a habit of cutting Vocal Adrenaline rehearsal short that day so she'd be home if Veronica ever wanted to stop by. They didn't talk about the sessions with Dr. Floyd as Shelby's parents were paying him $200 dollars a session for Veronica to talk to him.

"Hey…" Shelby said with a smile as she looked up from the stove and from where she stood Veronica could see that her mother was cooking her spaghetti and meatballs.

"Hi."

"How was your SAT prep class?" Shelby asked as Veronica took a seat at the breakfast bar. To cover up that she was in glee club, Veronica had told her mother that she had started taking SAT prep classes as she wanted to take them in December. Veronica needed to something to tell Shelby about where she was during the afternoons, Shelby had brought the SAT class lie but problem was Veronica now had to start studying for the SAT's as Shelby was now expecting her to take them in January. It made Veronica's life more stressful than it already was but it beat telling her mother the truth.

"Okay, just wanting to get it over with already but taking them in December gives me more time to prepare and study. I need to get a good score on it…" Veronica wearily said.

"Of course you will." Shelby said in a reassuring manner and Veronica could afford to give her mother a small smile. Despite all her faults and often being the bane of Veronica's life in an obvious ironic way, Shelby had an unwavering sense of belief in Veronica. It was a nice and reassuring thing for Veronica that her mother believed in her despite Veronica's flaws and issues.


End file.
